RESENSI ANEH - FILM KUCEK KUCEK MATAE

Sahabat Imajinasi, apakah anda pernah menonton film "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai"?!? Film yang indah, bukan? Baik! Sekarang… orang-orang di sinema itu telah hadir kembali! Dengan sekuel kisah berikutnya… yaitu, KUCEK KUCEK MATAE!!! Selamat Membaca!!!

My imagination buddy, did you seen the "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai" Movie?!? The good film isn't it? Well! Now... the actor or actress in that film has come again! With the next story... "KUCEK KUCEK MATAE (get youre eyes, clearly)"!!! Enjoy and read!!!

THE CRAZY REVIEW

KUCEK KUCEK MATAE (GET YOURE EYES CLEARLY) MOVIE

Di suatu Desa yang bernama Bombay, diadakan perkawinan yang megah dengan mahar nikah seperangkat alat berat ditambah uang 5.000.000 rupee (dibayar dengan cicilan 12 bulan, dan DP sebesar 10%).  Pernikahan itu diadakan untuk seorang pria yang bernama Rabul (diperankan oleh Marukh-Khan) dan seorang gadis yang bernama Anelli (diperankan oleh Kastol). Orang-orang di desa tersebut sangat berbahagia. Bahkan, konon katanya… resepsinya sendiri lebih besar dibandingkan resepsi pernikahan pangeran Charles! Para undangan yang datang pun terlihat amat banyak sekali… dimulai dari keluarga, kerabat, dukun kampung, tukang gali kuburan, sampai tukang kredit…

In a village called Bombay, held a magnificent marriage with a dowry  heavy equipment tools plus money set five million rupees (paid in installments of 12 months, and DP by 10%). The wedding was held for a man named Rabul (played by Marukh-Khan) and a girl named Anelli (played by Kastol). The people in the village are very happy. In fact, people was said... the reception itself larger than Prince Charles's wedding reception! The invitation came in sight very much at all ... starting from the family, relatives, shaman village, grave digger, until the debt collector ...

Rabul di dalam pernikahan itu sangat bahagia. Tapi tahukah anda… bahwa ternyata dia bukanlah pria yang boleh dikatakan baik-baik. Nun jauh di kota New Gelhi… Rabul juga mempunyai istri yang bernama Sutinah (diperankan oleh Rani Brekelhee). Tepat di hari Rabul menikah, ternyata Sutinah melahirkan! Dalam keadaan tanpa suami, akhirnya Sutinah nekad… menamakan anaknya… Gali Gongli! Seorang anak laki-laki berpusar lima, dan begitu lahir sudah bisa nangis dengan nada lirik lagu Iwan Fals. Hebat…

Rabul within marriage was very happy. But did you know ... that he was not a good man. Deep in the city of New Gelhi ... Rabul also has a wife named Sutinah (played by Rani Brekelhee). Since the day when Rabul married, Sutinah give birth the baby ! In a state without a husband, finally Sutinah desperate ... call her son ... Gali Gongli! A boy with five whirled hair, and soon after birth was able to cry in a tone of the song lyrics by Iwan Fals. Great ...

Nah, di dua peristiwa pernikahan dan kelahiran itu, ternyata… ibunya si Rabul tidak menyaksikan satu pun. Rabul orangnya rada brengsek, dan rupanya itu memang warisan keluarga. Mbak Inem (ibunya Rabul) malah sedang asyik-asyikan pacaran dengan seorang Om-om pemilik usaha sedot WC dan antar jemput tinja, Om Cobra namanya. Tanpa sekalipun memikirkan anaknya, dia malah indehoy di depan gedung KUA sambil bawa buku nikah (label kawin kontrak, dan kawin siri) baru yang ingin ditanda tangani.

Well, in that two events weddings and births, the Rabul’s mom did not witness anything . Rabul is a jerk, and apparently it was a family legacy. Mbak Inem (Rabul’s mother) instead being preoccupation going out with a business owner of the shuttle suction toilet stool, Om Cobra, his name. Without even thinking about her child, she’s going wild in front of the KUA building while carrying a new book of marriage (label contract marriage), hope to be sign.

Jadi, bagaimana kehidupan Rabul setelah dia punya istri baru, anak baru, dan istri yang udah gak up-to-date lagi? Rumah mana yang ia pilih untuk tingga? Aaah… ternyata pria itu tidak kunjung insyaf! Di sebuah tempat bermain… Rabul bertemu dengan seorang nenek yang lincah memainkan Skateboard, dan sepeda BMX. Dalam sekejap, Rabul jatuh cinta lagi! Lantas dia memanggil seorang anak kecil, kemudian menyuruh anak kecil tersebut menyampaikan salam mesra yang terbaik…

So, how Rabul’s life after had a new wife, new children, and wives who've not up-to-date again? Where The house he chose to settled down? Aaah ... it turns out he was not aware! In a playground ... Rabul met a granny who played a cathcy Skateboard, and BMX bikes. In an instant, Rabul fall in love again! Then he called a little child, told her convey for the best cordial greetings ...

Apakah usaha untuk menarik hati nenek gokil tersebut berhasil? Ternyata tidak! Rupanya… anak kecil yang disuruh Rabul itu, adalah adik kandung dari Anelli! (kok bisa nggak tahu, ya???). Nenek yang berstatus sebagai “skater” itu pun tidak mendapatkan salam apapun. Sebagai gantinya, sang gadis kecil melaporkan peristiwa ini kepada kakaknya, keesokan hari. Lalu yang lebih gila lagi… ternyata si nenek yang ingin dikencani Rabul, adalah nenek mereka berdua, kawan!!!

Is the effort to attract the hearts of crazy granny is successful? Apparently not! Apparently ... a child who was told by Rabul, is the younger sister of Anelli! (why can he doesn’t know, huh ???). “The Skater” Granny did not get any greetings. Instead, the little girl reported this incident to her young sis’, in the next day. Then a crazier ... The Granny who was wanted dating by Rabul, are the grandmothers both of them, fellas!

Pucuk dicinta, ulam tak tiba! Gayung kelihatannya tak pernah akan tersambut. Begitu mendengar kabar yang tidak mengenakkan ini… Anelli langsung merubah penampilan! Dalam waktu kurang dari 24 jam… dia sudah memotong rambut, ikut fitness (paket super ekspress buat ngencengin otot), kursus Karate kilat, taekwondo, jujitsu, Judo, Yoga, pencak silat, smack down, tari balet, yoga, bahasa inggris (ini buat apa ya?) bahkan dia turut membaca komik “One Piece” untuk mencari katalog tentang “buah iblis!”.

Shoots be loved, not of any arrived! The bailer never will take. Upon hearing this unpleasant news... Anelli instantly change the appearance! In less than 24 hours ... he had cut hair, joined fitness (super-express package for strengthen muscle), lightning karate courses, taekwondo, jujitsu, judo, yoga, Pencak Silat, smack down, ballet, yoga, english compersation (this for what?) even he's been reading comics "One Piece" to search catalog of the "the Devil Fruit”!

Rabul dalam bahaya! Untung saja diam-diam dia memperhatikan tingkah Anelli yang mendadak sangar tersebut. Dicarinya informasi… dan ah! Rabul memutuskan untuk lari! Dia harus pergi jauh sebelum istri mudanya menculik dan meletakkannya di kamar mandi dengan siksaan dan gergaji besi ala film SAW. Rabul pun akhirnya sangat sedih meninggalkan desa tersebut. Tapi patut anda ketahui, dia sedih bukanlah kehilangan Anelli. Rabul sedih lantaran usahanya untuk menjadikan Nenek “Skater” menjadi istri, gagal total tanpa basa-basi.

Rabul in danger! Luckily, he secretly watched the sudden frightening behavior of Anelli. He’s Looking for information ... and ah! Rabul decided to run! He must go away before his young wife kidnapped and put it in the bathroom with torture and a hacksaw by SAW films style. Rabul was ultimately very sad to leave the village. But you should know, he was not sad to lose Anelli. Rabul sad because of his efforts to make the skater Granny as a wife, total failure without further compersation.

Dalam kesedihan itu… Rabul memutuskan untuk singgah di rumah ibunya sejenak, curhat, serta menangis sepuas-puasanya. Tapi apa lacur? Ternyata disana ibunya sedang berpesta dengan Om Cobra dan tante janda 7 kali lewat musik dan organ tunggal. Rabul kaget, karena melihat peristiwa itu. Akhirnya ia sadar, bahwa sejauh ini… dialah yang salah! Dia harus datang ke rumah istri pertamanya untuk meminta maaf, dan membayar ojek yang ia tumpangi.

In the sadness ... Rabul decided to stop at his mother's house for a moment, vent, and cry as much. But what’s a story? Apparently in there, her mother was partying with Om Cobra and “a 7th time widow aunt” through music and solo organ. Rabul surprised, seeing the incident. Eventually he realized, that so far ... he was wrong! He should come to the house of his first wife to apologize, and pay for motorcycle taxis, which he rode.

Rabul pulang dengan semanagat, dia ingin menjadi orang baik. Tapi sayang, dalam perjalanan.. motor pak ojek yang ia tumpangi pecah ban gara-gara ditembak sniper dari jauh (yang salah sasaran). Rabul akhirnya terlambat datang ke rumah. Begitu dia tiba… terkejut lagi-lah pria tersebut! Karena tiba-tiba Om Cobra yang tadi berpesta sudah ada di rumahnya, dan merayu Sutinah untuk dijadikan istri setelah ibu Rabul itu.

Rabul back home with the spirit, he wanted to be a good person. But unfortunately, on the way .. the motorcycle taxis have an accident, the bike tire burst because a sniper’s shot from a distance (wrong target). Rabul finally late to come home. Once he arrives ... there the surprise again! Suddenly Om Cobra who had been partying had standing at his house, seducing Sutinah… to be his wife after the Rabul’s mom.

Benar-benar nasib yang buruk! Sudah mau dihajar istri muda, istri tuanya ingin nikah lagi! Sutinah yang sudah tidak tahan karena nggak pernah dapat nafkah batin setuju! Kalau dia nanti dijadikan Om Cobra istri yang ke-21. Sebenarnya, Om Cobra sudah merasa tak enak hati dengan Rabul… tapi apa daya.. Rabul yang sudah menyerah.. siap merelakan Sutinah pergi, dengan syarat sebuah operasi plastik biar wajahnya tidak dikenali lagi.

Really bad luck! Ready hit by the young wife, his older’s wanted to marry again! Sutinah who can not stand in living without makin love is agree! If he'll be a 21th wife of Om Cobra, indeed. Actually, Om Cobra had felt uncomfortable with Rabul ... but.. Rabul has give up .. ready to give for Sutinah leave… For Om Cobra, offers a requirement. He wanted a plastic surgery, let his face is not recognized

Diskusi punya diskusi, obrol punya obrol, lobi punya lobi… ternyata Om Cobra tidak setuju dengan operasi plastik yang Rabul tawarkan. Biayanya terlalu mahal, dan akhir-akhir ini masyarakat New Gelhi sudah tidak begitu sering keluarin tinja lagi (kok bisa ya..?). Tapi, demi ngotot menahan malu… Rabul berisikeras bagaimana caranya agar wajah pria itu berubah! Dia malu dengan tetangga yang akan bergosip. Aah, tapi ternyata ada cara yang lain.. kawan! Di kantongnya, ternyata Om Cobra menyimpan Jamu Jelekhin! Jamu perubah wajah yang amat paten, cocok sekali untuk berubah menjadi orang lain…

Discussions, talk after talk, loby and loby... appreantly Om Cobra not agree with the Rabul plastic surgery offer. The cost is too expensive, and lately the people of New Gelhi was less frequent for pops (how can this happening ..?). But, for the sake of humiliation ... Rabul insisted remains how to keep his face for changed! He was embarrassed by the gossip of neighbors. Aah, but there was another way .. my friend! In his pocket, Om Cobra turned of to save "Jamu Jelekhin" (Uglier Herb)! The very patent "Change-Face" Herb,well suited to turn into someone else ...

Lalu setelah dimiminum, apa hasilnya! BANG! Keajaiban terjadi! Dalam sekejap wajah Rabul (yang seperti wajah penulis) berubah! Dia yang ingin “tampil beda” dalam sekejam menjadi “tampil jelek!”. Begitu jamu tersebut diminum… barulah Rabul menjadi sangat menyesal! Mestinya ia tidak lari dari kenyataan, mestinya ia terima segala macam gossip dari pernikahan ibu dan istrinya (dengan seorang Om-Om itu). Mengapa Rabul menjadi semakin depresi? Jawabannya ada di gambar di bawah ini… dan sekian.. resensi Film Kucek-Kucek Matae… mudah-mudahan kita akan lanjut di edisi yang berikut!

And then afer he drunk, what the results?! BANG! The miracle is happening! In an instant time, Rabul face (who like a face of writer) is changed! He wanted to "look different" in so cruel have a "look bad". Once the herb is drunk ... then Rabul has remorse! Should he not run for the fact, should he take the gossips from marriage of his mother, and wife (with only that old playboy). Why Rabul become increasingly depressed? The answer is in the picture below ... and so .. this is the end of Kucek-Kucek Matae movie reviewer ... hopefully we will go, and back again in the following edition! See ya!!!